Another night under the moon

 Yet, no lessons learned or maybe? Maybe Charlie did - as this seemed to be a redo of years ago when he didn't want to see Avril and I went with someone else. At least that is what I am chalking my irresponsibility to anyways. That pop punk princess is still amazing and after thoughts are - holy shit 22 years ago. The shit I went through, got through and continue to grow thanks to music. 

After draggin my ass out of bed on the account that my honey did it at 4 am and went to work, I am showered and motivated for a day at work. Hopefully today goes smoothly. I now wake up and think wonder what shit work will bring and I need to just be grateful that I have a good job. So, I am grateful that I have a job. A job that allows me to pay my bills, keep food and a roof over our heads and still splurge on concert tickets. Even if I am not supposed to be doing that. It was a deal too good to be true and well hubby is worse than me at control. We are living our best life together and I need to stop stressing about the future and live in these moments with him because especially after last night and scream singing those songs, one thing made clear. I do not have a bad guy. 

So, having a moment this morning to reflect, that is what I want to walk away this morning most grateful for. Yesterday was hard for many reasons other than being away from my daughter on her birthday. I finally feel like I have broken free of the hell I went through with her father and his family. I finally feel free from the dumb shit and self destruction I put myself through. I truly feel like a new me, the me I always wanted to be. The me that my Memaw always knew I was and I feel free. 

Thank you universe for getting me through and mostly thank you music. These full moon concerts were everything I needed and I am thankful for the flow. The flow that will continue to fill my heart and soul into this new path I am leading. I do not have to get there today, but every day my baby steps are showing. Fuck yeah! 

I am thankful for a man in my life that will not make me feel little. Instead he puts me up as best as he can. Mostly he is allowing me to find myself while staying by my side and I guess that is what marriage is about. I need to stop being so hard on him and just let his love be okay. 

Tomorrow is my Friday at work and we are having a family day at 6 Flags - minus the fact that we are to let our kiddo and his friend roam and not be seen with him lol yep we are at that teenage stage. One last hoorah before we start school and I buckle down hard on that. 

Again though, I feel lifted and light with all that hurt in the past and I am going to move on in gratefulness and just love the shit out of this life I have now. 

Also, not wearing a bra today and I already feel awesome. 

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