Tuesday

 My kiddo's first unofficial day of summer as I am not making him go for the half day. I tried to sleep in after he kept me up until after midnight, but wasn't happening. Sometimes I want to go back to sleep just to jump back into the dream I was in. This one was interesting. Straight hippy, living in a van, seeing the country shit. My retirement plan. 

This week of work and the stress of being "retrained" on Thursday will be great cause for the vacation I took next week. Fuck it. Probably should of waited until later in the summer, but I have sick days too. Plus I am in much need of just waking up to enjoy the day and nothing else. So, that is what I intend to do. 

Today, though. Let's worry about that. I got some things done in my lesson for the schooling. Today I need to write it all and make sense of it. Then that one will be done and I can work into these power point presentations. 

Uber broke this week due to my insistent need for more bird food and it being 45 bucks. I need to slow down this birdie shit. The squirrels are wrecking everything and I can't afford to keep feeding them like this. 

Trying to figure out what to wear and wishing I didn't have to dress up for work. Every single day. 

I did decide that I am not going to hubby's game later. I will stay home and get the cat boxes clean then work out. Which I need to do desperately. It says storms, but Tuesday games never get rained out. 

I am tired. I am going to have to lay out some rules for this summer with the kiddo. Charlie talked me into not sending him anywhere, mostly because of how much it would cost, but all in all we are trying to start over to build back some trust so he can enjoy his summer. 

We shall see. Today I will work, work on these little summaries and then come home to get some exercise done. That is the plan. Lets hope I can get it all done. 

Fucking hate having to climb into everyone's box just to move towards my goals in life. Really debating on if these should be my goals. I know I am meant for more, but cannot for the life of me figure out what. Either way though I am going to keep going with this so I have something to fall back on then - maybe I will find some passion somewhere. 

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