Spring Rain

 Light Spring rain this morning and it feels like Spring is finally arriving. Hopefully no snow warnings are coming. Yesterday, I made myself go to the school with all my nerves and get the checks done. So, now I can continue on my current lesson and try to get through this stuff. I also managed to play some pickleball with hubby. I did have to cut out of that early though because of my heavy bleeding. 

I realized something yesterday though. I am pretty content. I followed up on those feelings and realized that I am where I want to be. I have a good husband, a good job and my kids stay out of trouble. My bills are paid and my kitties are healthy. I have a good routine and I shouldn't get bored with it. I should enjoy it and just keep going. That was always the plan. To have a healthy lifestyle and well here it is. Yes, kind of boring, but very much what I have always wanted. So, no more self sabotage. Just living this wonderful life I have made for myself. I am going to see if I can teach myself that I am now out of fight or flight mode. I can relax. I can live this routine and I am not missing out on anything. I have nothing to prove to anyone and I am thankful to my mind and body for getting me to this point in life. No drama. Just a happy, boring life and I am thankful for every bit of it. 

Simple mornings of having my coffee while surrounded by my kitties while being around while my kid goes to school. This is the life I wanted. This is the life I am giving my kiddo. No more regret or apologizing. Being consistent in this little life I built is all I need. 

Yes, having an actual friend to hang out with outside of my happy little family would be nice, but not required. I am building some good relationships at work, so not to worried about that. 

Waking up with full gratitude this morning. 

Today I have work and school work. I am not going to force myself to work out because my body is just drained of energy from my period and the universe still calming down from the Eclipse energies. So, yep just work and school shit. Then a nice family dinner at home to chill with my guys. Well I think hubby might have practice so that's even better for me - some alone time. 

The gloomy day is making it a little hard to be motivated and more sleep is always welcomed, but is is almost the weekend. April is not an action packed month for us and I am thankful for the little break. We then have a lot going on in May and June is the end of the school year. Wow. Time is just flying, but I think I am in a place to be okay with a little cruise control. 

After this coffee, I need to pack in some water today. 

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