Back to Mid-Winter things

 Basically just left feeling a bunch of self-pity and loathing. Trying to get out of that funk. So, back to my February intentions to align with my goals this year. Working in January happened, but not I am less inclined to be around a bunch of fucking people. I do not want to keep getting sick. So, need to get of this funk and back on my shit. I refuse to let this year start to kick my ass. 

Was going to do journal prompts, but just not feeling that lovely dovey shit. I haven't been able to sleep with my husband in a few nights and honestly, I am okay with it. Not like he gives two shits. Anyways. Me. Focus on me. 

Today's goals were accomplished for the most part. This room I have been confined to is cleaner. Clothes put away and well I am tired. I opened windows and lit my candles. Trying to think of my intentions for the upcoming year and honestly. Just staying healthy at this point is it for me. I haven't been taking the best care of myself anyways. Eating like shit, not working out. And just plain stressed. 

Zen February. I am going to Yoga when I can meditate in the mornings and just try to keep a calm mind in all of this chaos. I am removing myself from social media and I am going to find me a new hairdresser so I can get my hair done. I will focus on eating the best I can and getting back into the habit of cooking every day. Our vacation is at the end of the month and I can reward myself then. 

It is my birthday month and I can make this month all about me - my mind, body and soul. I will not be pushing myself to socialize, I will not be stressing myself out about signing up for classes. These small steps I am taking are enough. 

I am going to declutter my bed now so I can go to bed. 

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